I have only ever pictured myslef in a house with exposed red bricks.

Something about the timeless nature of it; the warmth it exudes when placed underneath Christmas lights.

But I fear for what will go on in this house. I fear I will look at the years spent before and want to be taken back to another place. That this house will not live up to all it is in my head.

I fear those walls will tumble if the foundation I built turns out to not be strong enough.

I am that kid again, googling tornados because I needed to be prepared for the day one would strike Utah.

That day still hasn’t come and I can say I wouldn’t know what to do.

I fear my dream brick house will tumble down and I will wish I was back in this uniform white shiplap house, because at least I know this one will stay up.